Tantrums
I think this is a familiar word to parents. When a child didn’t get what she likes… it is possible to show tantrums to express her frustration. Of course we know that it’s not right. But at an early age, kids do not understand things like this. What we have to do is make them realize that it is wrong. Some children throw tantrums and some never do. Luckily, my kids do not. Although I am aware that it is possible. Children throw tantrums as a way of expressing anger and frustration. ( I don’t know who is the founder of tantrums) If the behavior is dealt with incorrectly, the child may learn to use it to manipulate people and to gain attention. So our response towards their tantrums matters. In dealing with tantrums, the ultimate goal is to teach the child acceptable ways of expressing anger and not to suppress them their emotions
WHAT SHOULD WE DO?
What is the right thing to do during child’s tantrums? Give in? Spank her? Yell at her? Leave her? The thing that we should remember, is to remain firm and calm. Giving in just to stop the child, would likely repeat tantrums in another situation. You’re just teaching her how to manipulate you. Because the child will think that she will get what she want, if she do that.
Spanking and yelling, on the other hand would only make the situation worse. It would make the child hurt, more frustrated and angry.
SO WHAT IS THE BEST THING TO DO?
The best thing that you can do in times like this, is remain calm. Depending on the situation… you can use different methods in handling your child’s tantrums.
In public places
In public places, if possible, carry the child out of area so you can have more privacy. If you have a car, then that is the best place to take her. Do not give in, just to stop the child. If you cannot find any private place or you are in a situation that you cannot just go, just ignore your screaming child and give her time to realize that you are not buying her acts. Stay close to her and tell her that people are looking at her because of what she’s doing. Children, at young age acknowledge the presence of strangers. They seek for security, and more likely would come into your arms. When the child is calm, that is the time to talk to her. Remind her of what she did, everything that she did so she would understand what you are talking about, and tell her that it is wrong. It is not the way to get what she wants, and that it is not the right way to express her emotions.
At home
You can put your child in a safe place, like play pen or crib and leave her alone. Just be sure that the place is safe. Or you can stay beside her, just ignore her as if you are not hearing nor seeing her. Read book or open your computer…whatever you like to do. This would help her understand that her tantrums are not doing her anything good. When she is calm, talk to her and ask her what she wants. This way, she would realize that talking to you is the best way to get your attention.
It may be long before your child can fully gain self control… and she is counting on you as she is learning.
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